Time For More Cowbell

Seasonal Mood Swings

What is this season we are in? First, it’s spring, two years after everything got really weird. I’ve got a three seasons “clothes porch” in my car to deal with the weather — gloves, sandals, shorts, a cute “weather happens” jacket. My cats are watching a show they call “Two Birds Making A Nest” and we’ve been on raccoon patrol, desperately trying to discourage Momma Raccoon from having babies in our attic. I’m also back to living out of the shadows. My days as a sidelined boxer have ended. I have my fight back. If I’m honest, I’m feeling pretty damn good lately. I have been listening to “Grazing in the Grass” by Hugh Masekela on repeat, serious repeat. This song sounds exactly how I feel right now: a killer cowbell riff and bright trumpet anthems.

Aftershocks

But I’m wondering, how is everyone else doing? After I climbed out of my comfy leisure wear, thanked my coaches, family and friends, and put back on a business jacket and real shoes, I’ve been on a networking circuit of being in the same room as other people. For me, it’s glorious. The energy fuels me. I love connecting, sharing, learning, finding something to laugh about. I want to hear what other people are reading, doing, being. Meetings I intended to be short frequently go past the invitation end time. Everyone is doing OK, mostly, but there is a wave upon us, an aftershock.

Let’s Taco ‘Bout It

Most conversations start like this: Here’s what’s happening with business. Business, work, serious, productive, great. Some conversations start right at the ping-pong match: Here’s my COVID come apart and put back together story. Now your turn. Many of these conversations then shift to: Giant sharing session on what’s really going on around us.

A Reality Punch

The reality is, some people are not doing so hot right now. They’ve held on through some tough times and now they can’t hold on anymore. I recognize the feeling from before. Everyone’s breaking point and coping mechanisms look different, and when the big, fat bell rings again to end the round, some of us don’t get back up. Another bell has rung, a new group of fighters need a break, need help, need a coach, need to rest.

Unmasked Truth

I am reminded of a lesson from Burnout by sisters Emily and Amelia Nagoski: Just because you remove the stressors doesn’t mean you’ve completed the stress cycle. Yes, we are going places without masks. My kids had an band concert in an auditorium without masks, with a crowd, for the first time in two years (sniff, sniff). Also, according to Facebook, everyone I ever knew had a kid at prom this month, and I celebrate these beautiful, normal moments along with them. People are posting concert pics on social media again. Conferences are happening. Happy hours are in full swing, complete with alcohol-induced, close talking and food buffets. I’m back to just worrying about germs on public toilets and only occasionally throwing stink eye to someone coughing. All of these milestones are great, but it DOES NOT mean everyone is done processing what we survived.

Ding Ding

My bell rung over a year ago. I put on my shiny, satin robe and neck towel and went with relief to the locker room to re-tool. Now, I’m back in the ring. If it’s your time to complete the stress cycle, take a break. Do what you need to do to find help and feel better. If you’re OK and you tapped out in an earlier round, look for those who need to lean on you. Chances are they’ve either been the ones holding others up, or they’ve been quietly holding it together with old duct tape, hoping for a miracle. I’m proof that you can find the other side of whatever has you feeling like Rocky’s opponent. Ding, ding! What’s the bell telling you? After a break and a lot of work, I hear the cowbell, and it’s time for me to dance.

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